Warning: Alex Shelley is an Idiot
by I.Dream.Of.Hardyz
Summary: Yes, only Alex Shelley would call a cop an asshole and get himself arrested a few hours before a show. Inspired from a livejournal entry where he gets his hand caught in a car window.


**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

**Author's Note: **Inspired from Alex Shelley's livejournal entry where his hand was stuck in an automatic window. I don't know how it actually happened, and I know it wasn't like this, but I thought it was funny and decided to make a story from it. You should read Alex's journal, it's hilarious, lol. Enjoy!

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If I would have spent another hour alone with Alex Shelley, I might have killed him. Please, if anyone ever gets into a car with Alex Shelley when he hasn't slept all weekend, I warn you, you'll lose your mind. Or, you might find he'll do something incredibly Alex like and get his hand stuck in an automatic window as I was trying to stop the rain from falling on my new car and get us arrested.

It was a miracle he lived. I don't mean because his hand was stuck in the window. Apparently, some asshole cop had been watching us drive for a while now. He didn't like the guy in the sit next to me yelling along with bands he'd never heard of.

So, yes, I warn you. Alex Shelley is a danger to anyone who drives a car. It's a miracle we survived the night after all. And let me remind you, Alex doesn't think he should keep anything he's thinking in his head. So, he called the cop an asshole. Yeah, I was thinking the cop was an asshole, but I didn't say it. It would explain why we're sitting in a jail right now, waiting for Chris Sabin to pick us up. I'll bring you back to a few hours earlier when I thought we were just traveling to another show.

"I swear, Alex, if you want to live, turn that shit off," I muttered as he played some band he liked. I didn't care if he listened to music. I just wanted my hearing when we arrived for a show.

"It's my favorite song!" he yelled.

"I don't care."

He slowly rolled his eyes and then turned the radio down just a little. "Fine."

I rolled my eyes and stared at the road. Clouds threatened a heavy downpour and I was trying to make it to his show before it drenched the road. "Did you even sleep last night?" I wondered.

He smiled widely. "No."

"Lucky me."

"You shouldn't complain." He leaned forward and smiled. "It could always be worse."

"Yeah, I don't think so. I'm stuck in a car with you, with horrible music, and we're most likely going to be soaked in the matter of a few minutes."

"It could always be worse," he reminded me.

He was right.

He fell asleep in the car a few minutes later and I was driving alone, which I didn't mind. I wished for the rain to wait a few minutes more, but just as we neared the exit I needed, the rain started to fall. And it followed with a loud clap of thunder which woke Alex up and made him sit up. "What happened?" he yelled as I started to roll the windows up, deciding ruining my new car with rain wouldn't help. I didn't even notice his hand was sitting on the window.

"It's raining," I informed him dryly.

Just as Alex went to reply, he instead yelled in pain. I finally seemed to notice his hand was stuck in the window. "SHIT!" he yelled. "Morgan, stop the fucking window! My hand is in it, Morgan!"

"Why would you put your hand there?" I snapped. I was laughing though. I couldn't even tell you why, but I was. I didn't even stop the window as he continued his rant in my ear. As I went to push the window down, I noticed lights behind us, and closed my eyes. "Alex, I want you to remain calm and don't say a word."

Alex slowly removed his hand from the window and looked at me with anger in his eyes. "You want me to remain calm when you just fucking put my hand in the window!" he snapped, rubbing his hand and staring at me. "You're lucky it didn't break anything in my hand!"

"Alex, no. I mean, a cop wants us to pull over."

"_What_?" he asked. "Why?"

"I guess we'll know in a few minutes." I took a deep breath and pulled over in the downpour. Seconds later, a cop walked up beside us and asked to see my license while Alex mumbled about his hand. I noticed whoever the cop was didn't take his eyes off him. When he decided my license wasn't fake, he looked at me.

"Your music was incredibly loud." When I just stared at him, he sighed. "I've followed you for a while now," the cop explained.

I narrowed my eyes at Alex. "I told you."

"Whatever," he snapped, rubbing his hand still. "It's a car. No one else is on the road and no one seemed to care. Look, hey, you know, cop, I have a show to get too and many adoring fans who will just cry if I don't get there. We won't play our music loud again, man."

"Well, I still have to give you a ticket," the cop said.

"_Why_?"

"It's a law."

"What an asshole," Alex muttered.

"Excuse me?" the cop asked.

"I said, you're an asshole," Alex answered. "My hand was just stuck in a window, I was trying to sleep, and my best friend wouldn't let me listen to the music I love. Now, you, a fucking dickhead cop wants to give me a ticket for listening to music? Why don't you just go eat some donuts and leave us alone?"

I sighed.

Warning: Alex Shelley is an idiot.

"Excuse me, you'll have to step out of the car now," the cop said with a roll of his eyes. He looked at me and I knew Alex was pissed.

"Fuck you."

"Alex," I muttered. "Now."

I stepped from the car and the cop motioned to his. "Why?" I had to ask. "Can't you just take him? I mean, I don't think his fans will even miss him. He only has a few anyway, trust me. And I'm one of them, at least he thinks so. Actually, I don't even like him. You know what? I don't even know him. I saw Alex on the road before and thought I'd give him a ride. I don't know him!"

The cop wasn't amused. "In the car."

After fighting with Alex for a few minutes, Alex sat down in the cop car with me. "I hate you," I told him.

He smiled. "Don't worry; he won't even keep us here long. He's just scaring us."

Apparently, he wasn't trying to scare us, considering we're still sitting in our jail cell and Chris still isn't here. "Alex, you just had to say it could get worse," I muttered as I leaned against the wall. "Now you missed your show, my new car is sitting on the side of the road, and I'm stuck with you."

Alex smiled. "At least we had fun."

"_Fun_?"

"Well, who else could say this happened to them?" he asked.

I rolled my eyes as Chris walked into the room and we were able to leave. With a loud sigh, I narrowed my eyes at Chris and then looked at Alex. "I now understand why Chris was so excited you didn't want to travel with him this weekend."

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